Yesterday, as I was waiting for convocation to start, I was having a somewhat vehement vent to Joe, who was playing piano for me. I was complaining about how Southern pushes student missions so much. "Be a student missionary--you won't regret it!" "Take time off, figure out your life!" "Southern sends out the most student missionaries, uphold the standard!" Southern Missionary College. (hmm, well maybe that's better than Southern Matrimony College. . . ) I suppose this bothers me because I was never an SM. I don't feel like I was called to be an SM. How come Southern can't stress being a missionary here, in the United States, and prepare us to be missionaries after we graduate? What if we're passionate about reaching people here? This prompted the question to Joe, "Well, why don't we learn that stuff here?" He said, "If you want to learn that stuff, you've got to go to Arise, or AFCOE . . ." "But that's STUPID!" I cut him off. "I'm going to an Adventist school. We should be learning that here." "It's because we they have standards they have to keep up with here, and they're too caught up in the academics." I shook my head, appalled.

Convocation started and a bunch of people announced different activities coming up. Then Dr. Bietz stood at the pulpit. He made some remark about all the activities and then said, "But don't forget the real reason why you're going to school here. . ." As he paused, I wondered what he was going to say. Spirituality? God? What's the reason we're going to school here? " . . .the real reason why you're going to school here . . . academics." There you have it. Straight from President Bietz's mouth. Southern is about academics. If Southern was about academics for me, I wouldn't be here. The music department? Pshhhh, I could be getting a much better and cheaper academic education else where. (I mean band? Really!)

So why did I come to Southern? I went to public school. In high school I decided that I wanted to attend an Adventist school. I thought to myself, It will be nice not to have to worry about doing stuff on Sabbath. It will be nice not to explain why I don't go to dances. It will be nice to have people who understand why I eat strange food. It will be nice to be around Adventist young people. But you know what, I've gained a lot more than just fellowship and acceptance of my "strange" ways. I've grown into a deeper relationship with my Savior. Grades won't matter in heaven. You won't show up with "Straight A Student" written on your crown. (I'm not advocating being a lazy student. . .) What matters is that person you helped. The encouragement you gave someone when he was having a bad day. The service you've done for others. The time you've spent with Jesus. So why are you at Southern? In my last months here I hope to take full advantage of the opportunities I am given to grow in Jesus Christ--to start being a missionary here at school. After all, it is Southern Missionary College, right?

God's been good

Lorrie's been playing this song a lot lately . .

Lately I've been looking back, along this winding road
To the old familiar markers of the mercies I have known
I know it may sound simple but it's more than a cliche
There's no better way to tell you, than to say

God's been good in my life
I feel blessed beyond my wildest dreams when I go to sleep each night
And though I've had my share of hard times, I wouldn't change them if I could
'Cause through it all, God's been good

Times replay and I can see that I've cried some bitter tears
But I felt His arms around me, as I faced my greatest fears
You see I've had more gains than losses and I've known more joy than hurt
As His grace rolled down upon me undeserved

God's been good in my life
I feel blessed beyond my wildest dreams when I go to sleep each night
And though I've had my share of hard times, I wouldn't change them if I could
'Cause through it all, God's been good

For God has been my Father, my Savior and my Friend
His love was my beginning, and His love will be my end
I could spend forever trying to tell you everything He is
But the best that I can say it is this

God's been good in my life
I feel blessed beyond my wildest dreams when I go to sleep each night
And though I've had my share of hard times, I wouldn't change them if I could
'Cause through it all, God's been good

perspectives

Do you ever go through times where you just feel like being selfish? A visit to Patten Towers today brought my selfishness into perspective.

As Jackie, Lorrie, and I went up the elevator, the fire alarm starting going off. I have never been in the elevator before when the fire alarm went off, and it was kind of an frightening experience, to say the least! We were at the M floor with the doors open when the elevator started buzzing, and the doors shutting! We pushed them back open and ran down the stairs to the lobby. Getting stuck in the elevator was not on our list for the day. As we waited for the fire department to come, we saw a man we recognized from various activities with Patten. His name is Merle. As we talked with him about going on the River Cruise (which he thoroughly enjoyed) he said, "Hey, wanna see something beautiful?" He was reaching into his wallet, and took out a picture of two little girls. "Who are they?" Lorrie asked. "They're my daughters, replied Merle, "But I can't see them. My wife and I are divorced and I don't get to see them." Tears began to form in my eyes. He started talking about them. About their personalties. What they like. And he carries them with him everywhere in his wallet. Meanwhile, the fire department had gotten there and it was safe to go upstairs again. Merle said goodbye as he headed off to go up the elevator. Oh how much more Jesus loves us than Merle loves his daughters! That put things into perspective.
We boarded the elevator again. Our destination: Michael on the seventh floor. When Jackie and I were at the Zoo with Patten last Sunday, we talked with Michael for a while. He was pretty hyped up, but he calmed down after talking to us. Jackie said that we'd visit with him on Sabbath. I asked him, "What's your favorite food?" He looked at me apprehensively. "Why...?" "Because maybe we can bring it to you!" I responded. "Well...chicken teriyaki," he said matter of factly.

So armed with chicken teriyaki from China Kitchen, we rang Michael's doorbell. He came to the door and looked at us. "Hi Michael!" we all chorused. The first thing he noticed was the food. "What's that?" he asked, suspiciously eying the bag Jackie was holding. "Chicken teriyaki!" A huge grin spread across his face. "I didn't think you guys were gonna come!" He kept saying it over and over. His face was beaming. He invited us in. We stepped into a large room with a dilapidated couch, a couple mattresses on the floor, and a TV. He sat down on his bed and chomped down on the egg roll. We visited a few minutes and then left for the eleventh floor to visit Sally. A few dollars spent on chicken teriyaki. A few minutes of visiting. A few hugs. That's all it took to make Michael's day--and it was so worth it to see the look on his face. Perspectives.
We rang the bell on Sally's door. "Who is it?" the raspy voice croaked from inside. "It's us! We're back!" The smile on Sally's face didn't look as bright. She was in more pain than usual.

At the beginning of this year, we didn't know if Sally wanted to continue Bible studies, or if she just wanted us to visit with her. Then, a few weeks ago she came out with this, "I keep waiting so long after I talk, because I'm waiting for you to preach at me again!" Well, I guess that cleared that up. We asked her if there was anything in particular she wanted to study. "Well, I keep trying to read the book of Revelations, but I don't understand it." The light bulb went off. Of course she wanted to study Revelation. Last year she mentioned to us several times that she was "reading Revelations, but I don't understand." So yesterday we had our first exciting study on the book of Revelation. I know the Holy Spirit was there to help her understand. She put her marker in her large print Bible for Revelation 2. "So I can be ready next time when you come."

Perspectives.

Standing Tall

How many of you were blessed by SEYC this past weekend? I'm so thankful to be ReGenerated! Last night I made a commitment to stand up for Jesus. I've been on the Mason-Dixon line. When I was little I asked my mom why Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego didn't just pretend to "tie their shoes" when the music played and they were supposed to bow down. I always struggled with being different in public school--Why don't you go to dances? Eww, what are you eating? Why can't you do stuff on Saturday? And then I dreaded graduating here and once again going out in the world--to be different. I know, Jesus was different, but what if I didn't want to be different like him? It didn't help me to know that Jesus was spit upon so I shouldn't mind being spit upon. It didn't make it any easier to be mocked and made fun of. Then Ivor Myers spoke about looking at the face of Jesus. Jesus beheld the face of God every single day and was bruised for it. Would I miss out on Heaven for something? Would I miss out for blending in with the world? Is that worth it? Am I willing to obey the Word, even if it causes me to die? I need to stop looking at my tiny wounds and look at His wounds to be healed! The glory of God is to be willing to be spit on, marred, and to take on the character of God. When that glory shines in our faces, we won't be ashamed to be different. It's not about self, it's about God. Wow. Then last night I realized that I was on the Mason-Dixon line. I was wearing both blue and gray in order to fit in with either side. Around my Christian friends it's easy to wear all blue. I was one who would probably pretend to tie my shoes, or wear a little gray to blend in with the world. I want to be like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego to stand up for Christ even if everyone around me isn't.

Jesus, I My Cross Have Taken, 325

Jesus, I my cross have taken,
All to leave and follow Thee;
All things else I have forsaken;
Thou from hence my all shalt be.
Perish every fond ambition,
All I've sought, or hoped, or known;
Yet how rich is my condition,
While I prove the Lord my own.

Let the world despise and leave me--
They have left my Savior, too;
Human hearts and looks deceive me--
Thou art faithful,
Thou art true.
O, 'tis not in grief to harm me,
While Thy love is left to me;
O, 'twere not in joy to charm me,
If that love be hid from me.

Soul, then know thy full salvation:
Rise o'er sin, and fear, and care;
Joy to find in every station
Something still to do or bear.
Think what Spirit dwells with-in thee;
Think what Father's smiles are thine;
Think that Jesus died to win thee;
Child of Heaven, canst thou repine?

Haste thee on from grace to glory,
Armed by faith and winged by prayer;
Heaven's eternal day's before thee;
God's own hand shall guide thee there.
Soon shall close thy earthly mission,
Soon shall pass thy pilgrim days;
Hope shall change to glad fruition,
Faith to sight, and prayer to praise.

-Henry F. Lyte

Lately for devotions I’ve been reading about the children of Israel and their wanderings in the desert. I love studying it because I find so many parallels between their lives and my life. As I was reading along in Patriarchs and Prophets yesterday, I came across an extremely powerful paragraph. The children of Israel have almost completed their 40 years of wandering. They are ready to go into Canaan. First they must overcome some obstacles. Here’s what she says: “The Hebrews now remembered how once before, when their forces had gone to battle, they had been routed, and thousands slain. But they had then gone in direct opposition to the command of God. They had gone out without Moses, God’s appointed leader, without the cloudy pillar, the symbol of the divine presence, and without the ark. But now Moses was with them, strengthening their hearts with words of hope and faith; the Son of God, enshrined in the cloudy pillar, led the way; and the sacred ark accompanied the host. This experience has a lesson for us.”

Here’s the amazing part.

“The mighty God of Israel is our God. In Him we may trust, and if we obey His requirements He will work for us in as signal a manner as He did for His ancient people. Everyone who seeks to follow the path of duty will at times be assailed by doubt and unbelief. The way will sometimes be so barred by obstacles, apparently insurmountable, as to dishearten those who will yield to discouragement; but God is saying to such, Go forward. Do your duty at any cost. The difficulties that seem so formidable, that fill your soul with dread, will vanish as you move forward in the path of obedience, humbly trusting God.”

How often I forget that He is our God--the God who turned the water into blood and parted the Red Sea. With God on our side, I have nothing to fear.

changes (title stolen from jackie)

I don't like change. Different things. Different people. Old things gone. Old people gone. New things. They all make me uncomfortable! It seems like moving on means that I have to forget the past--or the good times of the past are blurred because of the tumultuous, changing present. For instance, I had a really good friend not come back to school this past year. It seemed like in order to accept the change and move on, I had to forget the past. I'd have to forget how things used to be. Let go. The connection to the person would be different. This past week a really good friend left camp. Another change.

In a changing world, however, there's one thing that doesn't change.

For I am the LORD, I change not... Malachi 3:6

Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever. Hebrews 13:8